Gain a fresh perspective for a stronger relationship
Whether you are dating, or have been married for many years, there are challenging seasons in every relationship. It takes effort and intentionality to maintain a deep, life-giving connection through it all. It’s not always easy to navigate the highs and lows alone, though. Sometimes you need an outsider’s perspective to support you.
“We were doing alright, then…”
Something about your relationship is weighing heavily on your heart. There are so many difficult circumstances that can greatly impact the quality of your relationship.
MAYBE YOU'RE CURRENTLY FACING:
- Life transition such as raising kids, becoming empty nesters or caring for aging parents
- Career change, job instability or financial issues
- Unforeseen personal crisis, infidelity or have otherwise drifted apart
Sometimes, what you need is a space to talk.
Therapy is a powerful tool for couples to deepen their understanding of one another and explore their relationship in new ways. Maybe you’ve never considered therapy before, or are upset at the idea that you are thinking about it now. I get that. Whatever has happened on your path that’s brought you here today, my hope is that you feel some sense of peace that support is a possibility.
I want to offer you…
Support that leads to change
My job is not to tell you whether or not you should stay together–only you and your partner can decide that. My role is to walk beside you to support you in change, and to assist you in learning how to do things differently than you have in the past so that you arrive at new and healthier outcomes.
Space to get things out in the open
Although there’s no guarantee for a certain outcome of couples therapy, what is possible is the opportunity to express and communicate what’s been negatively impacting your relationship. No matter how trivial or large the issue, our first step is to get it out in the open so that we can take some of its power away and hand it back to you and your partner.
A tailored approach to therapy
Everyone is different, so I like to tailor my therapy approach to meet your needs as a couple. I’ll pull from a variety of techniques, including attachment theory and mapping the cycle, to help you connect with your current emotional experience and bring awareness to your relationship patterns. Together, we’ll uncover what’s going on and bring in new skills to replace the old unhelpful ones.
At this point, you may be thinking, “Okay Ashley all of this sounds good to me, but I’m not sure that my partner is as willing as I am to start therapy. How do I get them on board?”
Rarely are two people in the exact same place in their motivation, readiness or receptiveness to therapy. That’s normal, and okay. Being accepting and open to hearing your partner’s concerns may be a good first step to preparing for the conversation about trying therapy.
If you are feeling ready, but don’t know how to start that conversation, don’t worry–I’ve got you. Here are some ideas for conversation starters about beginning therapy if you are having a hard time thinking of how to bring it up to your loved one:
Some frequent concerns are...
01.
One partner or the other
Your partner may be concerned that the therapist will side with one partner or the other, due to how they feel they may be portrayed in therapy.
02.
NEGATIVE Experience
Perhaps they or someone they know had a negative therapy experience, so they are reluctant to seek treatment.
03.
IT Won't Work
They have a preconceived notion that if therapy is hard, or problems aren’t “fixed” right away it means failure or divorce for the relationship.
3 Ways you can start the conversation
“So I have an idea I want to run by you about some of the issues we’ve been feeling stuck on. I’ve been looking into couple’s therapy so that we both have an equal opportunity to share our concerns with an unbiased professional. I found someone who sounds great on their website, do you want to take a look too, and see what you think? We can schedule a consultation call so that we can both ask any questions we have.”
“Hey I don’t know about you but I feel like we’ve been going in circles lately, and I think we both want to make this work. I found a therapist that I think I’d feel comfortable with; do you want to check out their website to see what you think? I wanted to sign up for something we both feel good about, I know this decision is important to both of us.”
“I know that neither of us thought we would be in a place where we needed outside help, but I don’t think either of us has been very happy lately. I think that we both deserve to be happy though, and I’m willing to work on it if you are. I found a therapist that I like, but I didn’t want to sign up for something without consulting you first-would you like to check out the website I found?”
Ready to explore how therapy can improve your relationship?
Frequently Asked Questions
My approach to treating your mental health from a holistic perspective is what sets me apart as a clinician. I am a Certified Integrative Mental Health Provider, and this gives me a lens that broadens the scope of the questions I will ask so that I can support you across the many areas of life that feed into your mental health goals. I not only want to hear about what is bringing you into therapy, I want to hear about all of the pieces that make you who you are. I’m interested in lifestyle, nutrition, sleep, spirituality/faith, physical activity, and relationships to name a few.
I am private pay only, and do not accept insurance. However, you will receive a Superbill after each session showing what you have paid, and you can send these to your insurance to request reimbursement if you’d like.
No, not at this time. All sessions are conducted over a secure, online video platform.
Whether it’s about a relationship, or you’re just not feeling like yourself; it’s usually a good idea to get started sooner than later when you notice the concern. When you feel ready, reach out for a 15-minute free consultation.
Yes! Mindfulness has a range of health benefits, and I enjoy helping clients learn how to integrate it into their daily lives. If mindfulness skills are an area of interest for you, we can make that a part of therapy specific to your mental health goals.
The therapy process is different for everyone, and can be uncomfortable at times. Research has shown that overall, people typically feel some relief from their reporting symptoms after engaging in as few as 8 sessions of therapy.
No, only a professional with an MD can prescribe medications. This includes Psychiatrists, and General Practitioner medical doctors. If you already have a prescribing MD for your medications, you can sign a release of information so that I can communicate with your physician when necessary about your care to support your mental health goals.
Phone: 858.480.5240 | Email: ashleyharristherapy@gmail.com
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